Make sure you two survive…

At the end of the day, you realize you don’t really know people the way you think you do.

They always end up surprising you…

Whether it be for good or bad…

They always end up surprising you…

Tonight I had the magnificent moment of clarity with someone who I thought would never

hurt me…. who I thought would end up understanding me for who I am… who i thought

would never judge me or ever say mean and hurtful things to me….

Boy was I wrong…

I thought he loved me

(Funny thing is I still think he does…)

But I guess pain and hurt and fear turns even the kindest of souls into something they

aren’t…

I hope to one day be able to forgive him truly for the things he said to me that will forever

mess up my self esteem even more than it already is… but I also hope to one day forgive

myself for letting my innermost demons out and messing him up…

I know he didn’t and doesn’t deserve it… the pain, anguish, hurt, uncertainty, the horrible

things that in the end will mess up how he views relationships and people…

But I also know that inside there is still the goofy, silly, dorky young man I fell in love with

and that is the person I want to spend my days with…

But while walking through the storms together i lost sight of the man I fell in love with…

It’s as though someone took him away and put this ugly and mean version in his place…

I never even realized the person who did that was none other than me…

But it’s time to fight and get him back…

“If you truly care about him you will take the leap and whatever comes you’re way to make sure you two survive…”

I want us to survive…

He’s my Butt Munch lol

I love him…

 

 

 

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